change

i got extremely sick of staring at a computer just about an hour ago. so i watched a little more TV and then got in bed to read. but while reading i got inspired to blog, altho not necessarily about what i was reading (This Is Your Brain on Music). like i did last year and like i plan on doing for years to come, around new year's i sat down and wrote out a list of resolutions for the new year. i debate how many and what detail at the time, just a few weeks ago (it feels like much more). over the past week or so i've given thought to what kind of start i am off to on the yearly quest of resolving myself to new goals and growth.

the final conclusion? in some ways i think i'm doing well, in others not. but change (not that i feel some impending need to change myself based on a dislike of anything about me - let's be honest, i'm so spectacular that no growth is even necessary) takes time. more importantly, growth is a process. it'd be easy to hold myself to some standard and just say i've already failed (based on things like, e.g., the fact that i have not worked out once to start the year). but life is about taking steps and taking those steps in the right direction. it's easy to sprint out of the gate and then tire. it's also easy to start out too slow and fall so far behind that u just throw in the towel. so i guess it's about balance.

i've been reading more lately, writing here a little more often, and just balancing out the grind of working with time to just get away from it all (with tv, music, private dance parties, surfing the interweb, chatting, seeing friends, and sleeping at funny times of day) and honestly it feels nice. even with the things i may not like or enjoy, balance provides a sense of calm.

at the end of the day, i want to to do more (when it comes to a lot of things, not just the handful of resolutions). but u take your steps each day or when confronted with each situation. it's crazy to think 1 of the 12 months of the year is almost gone (i gotta get that last hour of MCLE time in). it seems so fast yet it also seems like so much happened in that same span. hopefully we all get to the end of the next 11 months and have progressed and moved in a positive direction.

rain.

it's been raining quite a bit down here in LA over the last week, for those who didn't know. i know the weather is worse in other place and there are place that get a ton more rain, but i guess we got as much rain in one day as we did in all of last year. anyway, i'm not about to complain about the rain at all. in fact, i'm here to celebrate it.

sometimes rain is really depressing. often it's just a pain in the @$$. but it's been nice for some reason lately. i think it's in part because it's been needed (altho i'm sure with all the fires down here it's leading to mudslides due to the lack of vegetation and it's led to snow in the mountains and unfortunate deaths). it's been pretty dry down here and i feel like the rain (or at least some of it) will lead to regrowth and a fresh start.

the rain can be cleansing and refreshing. it also just causes u to kinda slow down, literally and metaphorically. seeing how green places can be after some rain just reminds you that, while it can be depressing it's also vital to life and growth and sometimes restarting.

so i'm just trying to enjoy the rain and slow down, reflect, and kinda let the rain wash away it needs to...

sample innovation.

A while back I came across this post on current.com. The actual post itself is really cool and interesting. But what got me thinking a bit more was one of the comments left about one member's feelings of conflict over sampling. You can scroll down and read her comment and also see some of my thoughts. I'll probably repeat myself here as well.

Sampling definitely irked me at times. There's the obvious dislike for when someone does a poor job sampling something or takes something you feel is a classic that should never be touched and samples it. But what has been, at times, more troubling is the feeling if discomfort about sampling more generally: the feeling that when someone samples something there is a lack of innovation or creativity.

When kanYe first came out and everyone was talking about his sampling, I was kinda disappointed for a minute. I felt like: hey, here's this great music but it lacks originality. Originality is something I think we all respect, admire, and sometimes seek out. I think we want to be original, we want to be the first or we want to come up with it on our own.

In his book The Tipping Point, Malcolm Gladwell discusses the types of individuals he calls "innovators" and the role they play in causing an epidemic to explode. [If you haven't read the book, I highly recommend it] I'm not going to attempt to critique his writing or really give a detailed description of who he considers an innovator. But I know that a part of me, as I read the book, wanted to be an innovator.

But with time and thought and most importantly a little learning, I feel I've gotten past the discomfort I felt earlier. Originality, innovation, and creativity are all great. With sampling I think it is still possible to posses all of those. Sampling involves a creative process all its own and, to be done well, requires the building upon something from before but taking it to a different place. It can be an art all it's own and much of creation and art is based upon learning from and building upon what came before.

When you look at some of the things kanYe samples, I don't think many people would ever think to so what he does. Not only that but he was able to successfully sample Michael Jackson's P.Y.T. (which is the greatest song ever), a feat I thought impossible (you just don't mess with MJ, there's no need for it).

This is not meant to be a defense of kanYe but just thoughts more generally about the place of originality and innovation in our world. More accurately, it's a critique on how those ideas are defined and thought of more generally. To take something that already exists and make something new of it or with it is innovation itself, it requires a certain level of creativity and original thinking, because it was not used that way before.

Obviously it's easy to screw up. Sometimes sampling is the result of a lack of creativity, originality, etc. For example, The Departed was a great movie but I felt like Scorsese didn't deserve nearly the credit he got (especially an Academy Award) because of how it was a clear copy of the movie Infernal Affairs. [While I won't give Scorsese credit for his work, I definitely do think the actors in the movie did a marvelous job and deserve much credit for their work] But there shouldn't be any rush to disregard something "sampled" until inquiring into how what is sampled is used.

Anywho, I'm gonna go see what's on the food network and make myself hungry and then eat. Also, I've started yelping! hehe.

weekend update...

i'm in a familiar place, lying on a familiarly funny couch to lie down on in a familiar setting. taking full advantage of the long weekend, i drove up to sf for these few days and doubt i'll get a chance to write for the next few days so i'm gonna sneak in my usual recap a little before the trip ends. with that said, here's the usual list of fun times and highlights, along with some anticipated events...

• a nice drive on some open road with just music and thoughts
• sparking it up
• seeing the funny crowd at Circa
• Big Things Poppin at Gravity
• late nite grubbin
• finding out that Sauce isn't very good
  
• Cirque du Soleil's Kooza
• a nice Sunday brunch
• some time reading at the ol' Coffee Bean and then reading the Afterword to The Tipping Point at a small bookstore (my copy of the book was before the Afterword was included...weak)
  
• finally getting to check out Betelnut
• kicking back and just watching DVD to relax the nite away
  
• brunch with the boys at Stacks
• road trip with some company
• finally eating at Sonic (it was totally worth the short detour)
• belting out songs in the car ride home (Jam on!!!!!!!)
  

one of the best parts of this trip has been kicking it old skool style and being reminded how great some of my friendships are: how much i appreciate these people in my life and that the feeling goes both ways. sometimes it's all too easy to never express feelings in a clear or outright manner. but i think it's important to let people know your feelings, thoughts, and just plain gratitude for being the part of your life they are.

on a completely different note that is related to events of the weekend, for a while i've pondered reviewing place on Yelp. i feel like my writing abilities are not of the level to really do a great job reviewing, critique, opinionating about things. i also don't think i possess the necessary knowledge to be good at something like that, but i guess Yelp isn't really all about being formalistic. eating at Sauce and the accompanying disappointment have put me to the place where i think i'll really start using Yelp to leave reviews as well as read up on places. part of my hesitancy is that i'd want to include my favorite places i've already been to but now i'm planning on just starting now and starting with the places i go to as time goes by. so i guess that means i'll be starting off with Sauce, Venus, and Betelnut.

anywho, it's late and i'm already looking forward to brunch!

settled.

This past weekend I trekked all the way out to Covina (about 30 miles away) to pick up the dresser that matches my bed and bedside table from IKEA. It's funny to think that buying this silly piece of furniture due to my need to have matching furniture is what has finally allowed me to feel settled in my newish digs. i'm sure it seems silly but I've got all the furniture in order, even if I still need to get rid of one big thing taking up space unnecessarily.

It's more than just the furniture but it was like a missing piece. I feel at home here, something I didn't really feel just 30 feet down the hall. It was such a small place and one that I always knew was not permanent in any way. At least that how I always felt about it.

I'm not sure how long I'll be in this space. But I love this space and I know I'm hear for now. I'm looking forward to whatever is next but I'm taking the time to really enjoy the present and focus on the now. I'm enjoying this space to the full extent that I can and just trying to take a positive approach to each day, even if there are things about being here that are difficult. It's still a wonderful time and a pretty sweet place too.

The nicest thing about feeling settled here is that it adds a calmness to life. I can come home and just escape everything for a bit and really relax. When you don't feel settled, a place doesn't feel like home. An extend time like that for some reason takes a toll on an individual. So while Los Angeles may not feel like the long term place for me and while it is missing the people I care most about, at the least there is this small space I can come back to everyday and feel truly comfortable and at peace, even if the rest of life doesn't feel quite like that.

Anyone want to come visit?

sad.

i completely blanked on what i was going to write here. i'm about ready to hop in bed for the nite and do a little reading to unwind before another work week. i stopped off at my computer to read what my brother wrote on his blog about the passing of Jim Posante, one of the members of the faculty from our high school.

i never knew Jim very well, altho he and my brother were close and i imagine he knew more about me than i did him. to be honest, as a young kid in high school i was intimidated by his charismatic personality. i don't really know why, he seemed like a wonderful individual. hearing about his passing is deeply saddening even tho i wasn't close to him. he was a vital part of the Greenhills community, as well as that of Ann Arbor. i know he played an important role in the lives of many people who i care about and am close to, as well as many beyond that. so, not knowing exactly what to do, i share these thoughts here. my thoughts and prayers are with all his loved ones. and i'm thankful for the small amount i did get to know him.

i'll be back tomorrow to write more on other topics, but i felt a need to at least put down these few words.

a look back...

as is often the case when i write here, i've been meaning to get this post out for a few days now. due to a busy travel schedule, work, and feeling ill for the third time in like 7 weeks i'm writing now.

the obvious thing to do here is list a bunch of resolutions for the New Year. i'll get to that but i plan on starting with a look back at the year that was: 2007. highlights of the year include (in no particular order)...

• spending time at home for the holidays with family and great friends
• all the trips to the Bay
• finally getting a job
• moving into a one-bedroom apartment
• monday nite dinners with Jeremy
• meeting new ppl, making some new friends, and developing new connections with ppl
• being forced to stake my own place in this world again, reevaluating my place and my goals

i'm sure there is a ton of other stuff i could list here...but the point is that the year was full of great times and overall a great year. it was a year full of change, some big and some smaller, but i feel these years in our lives (whether you're going thru them, went thru them, or have yet to do so) are ones of transition and growth and figuring it all out.

this stage in life is a massively transitory one, where relationships change (beginning, ending, growing) and our goals and ideals meet the reality of the world. sometimes there's a big conflict in these things and other times a harmony. i'm betting for the most part it's a mix of both and it has been for me.

change can be difficult and scary and hard. but u grow and adapt and u make the changes ur own. then u look back with a certain awe at what transpired (sometimes wondering how u could have been so foolish and done some of the silly things u did) and see the growth and see how u've reached a better place or are on ur way towards one.

anyway, enough getting all philosophical on it.

other quick highlights i'd like to include are the following...

highlights from the Holidays at home:

• time with my family
  
• the enormous X-mas tree and all mom's awesome decorations
• getting to sleep in til noon
• hearing Nick sing, even if only a handful of carols
• TK Wu
• SF homies back in the Deuce
• the awesome spread of food for X-mas dinner
• 1971 Chateau D'Yquem
• getting my dance on with the old skool homies on my last nite in town

highlights from the brief New Year's Eve trip to the Bay:

• great food!
• spending time with ppl i really enjoy
• Rock Band
• Sam's bottle of Patron
• prom pics and all the other pics [check the flickr!!!]
• getting to see Meeeeeeeeeeeeechigan handle Florida
• relaxing on New Year's day and getting to check out a neat local movie theatre

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speaking of Meeeeeeeeeeeechigan...

i loved watching the game and seeing Meeeeechigan's tough style of play defeat Florida's spread offense. seeing the team play so well was a little bittersweet: it showed what truly could have been this season but it was also so satisfying beating Florida and also seeing the team play so well for Lloyd Carr and also see the seniors on the team finally get a victory in a bowl game.

something i found particularly interesting was how Lloyd Carr and what was largely an old skool style of Michigan football (with some aggressiveness and creativity thrown in) defeat what amounts to the incoming style of play of Coach Rich Rodriguez. and that is a subject i've had mixed feelings over...it's exciting but it's also change (see above). not only that, there are certain aspects of the spread offense that i'm not a huge fan of and not sold on. i just hope the new coach, while bringing in change also brings the consistency Michigan has maintained as well maintains certain aspects of the program and style of play. in dealing with change, adaptation is crucial and in this case i think that's as true for Rodriguez as it is for the players, fans, and so on.
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the New Year.

i thought a fair amount about resolutions recently. should they be few or many? specific and detailed or open-ended and broad? easy or difficult? as with everything, i think balance is key and everything in moderation. with that in mind, here are some things i plan on working on this year:

• eat healthier, workout more, and generally take better care of myself - i'm not getting any younger and it'd be nice to just generally feel healthier and fitter and more active
  
• develop more at work, work harder, learn more, and better prepare myself for whatever is next - lately i feel i'm not progressing as i should at work and that i don't know as much as i should at this point in time; maybe it's just me but i'd like to feel more knowledgeable and have a better sense of what's going on and how it all works
• be more creative, artistic, what have u - in '07 i got back into taking fotos a bit and it was a ton of fun and really rewarding; i want to take it a step further and spent more time with the arts and hopefully incorporate it into my career
• write more - both here and in my journal
• spend as much time as i can with the ppl i care most about and enjoy that time as much as possible - i get to spend less and less time with my family and that is difficult, at the same time i saw more of some really good friends than i did when i lived nearer to them
• not make the same mistakes i made before - or more importantly, learn from my past experiences and further develop who i feel i should be in life
• be more responsible and on top of things

i dunno, these are the things that came to mind right now. it's not as well formulated as i would like but these are all things i hope to improve on and intend to spend time on.

anywho, i hope everyone had a Happy Holiday season and a Happy New Year!!!