Let's go blue.

boredom

I find an intense boredom sets in at times, in various aspects of life. For example, work used to often entail periods of hours with nothing to do...but the past few weeks have changed all that and provided a plethora of stuff that needs to be done, keeping me busy throughout the day. Even with so much to keep me busy I find myself a bit bored at times, hence the taking a quick break to blog.

But the grander form of boredom comes in the land of daydreaming. I hope to never stop daydreaming. Personally, spending time daydreaming is a sign of youth; even though I've entered the adult or "real" world there's still a child inside me or that is a part of me. Yet I grow tired of daydreaming in the sense that I'm ready for some of those dreams (the ones that are actually capable of coming true) to come to fruition and to, in a sense, lead the life I want to be living.

Not to say I'm not doing so in many ways, but some of the daydreams grow old because they are yet to become reality and others are frankly just stale and repetitive. The remedy is to make some changes and also find some new things to ponder as the days go by and I spend time with my mind elsewhere. It's similar to the periods in life where I yearn for new music. And while there are some new "things" I could use in life, it's good to find contentment and even joy in the present because it's pretty awesome in its own right. Plus, the future holds what it may and I'm sure is full of changes, new daydreams, and lots of other silliness (which in my opinion should be spelled with a 'y').

I'm really craving the McDonald's that is scheduled for lunch...so I'm off to kill 15 minutes before heading out...

[epic] weekend up[date]

After taking a 6-week hiatus from trips to the City (a very long time for me), I headed up to celebrate the birthday with friends and it was a grand time. One of those friends and I often talk about the lives we lead and the fun we have in terms of being "epic." It's a topic that has come up before in this space but as I made my way home I spent some time thinking about it as I relfected on how great the weekend was. At the end of the day, I feel the reason the term is appropriate for our way of life, because no matter what we have a good time doing what we do and enjoy it to an extent that it truly is epic. The fun we find in things, from the "objectively" epic to the mundane...the level of enjoyment we take in these things is truly epic in proportions. While this sense of joy may not come with all things, I feel it's always present when our group is together, be it two of us or three or many many more.

I do these lists of weekend highlights...always trying my best to remember the best moments of each weekend...but because of how great these times are and how many amazing moments there are [from Los's funny statements, to Peter's witty commentary and retorts, to getting crazy on the dancefloor with Al, Ed, and any other member of our crew]...it's simply impossible to document them all...so there lists are really only a glimpse of everything and the grand epicness of it all...on that note...

list up!

• realizing how much i missed this place and the feeling of coming home as i walked out of the bart station
• a warm welcome and a cup of tea
• the slowest service ever
• "Los: I thought he was going to text message everyone to tell them his VP.
• Lou: what do u expect him to do, shoot a text that's like 'Yo Los, this Obama. Just wanted to let u know i'm going to Biden up.'?"
  
• "Cheeeeeetas!!!!"
• "Did she just say Cheetos?"
• a bevy of talent
• Don't Stop Believing & P.Y.T.
• "Do you want to go to an orgy?"
  
• Los asking if he could take a picture
  
• asking for a ride home
• the dood who was clearly tripping on something
• brunching up
• Los finding a good color for paint
• go-karts [and owning everyone at racing them]
• the 4 kazoos
• my embarrassing performance in the batting cages
• dinner and drinks with friends
• catching up
• "You could go to war with Los and he'd get you a slice of pizza."
  
• dancing the nite away with a great group of people
• "Los: hey Lou, do u know who I have a man crush on?
• Lou: who?
• Los: Sam Song"
  
• most of the regular dance crew below (minus Los and Sam)
  

• late nite pizza
  
• the quick hangover turnaround
• kickin it at du soleil with a croque monsieur, cheese danish, and cafe au lait...and good company of course
• the cute gurl in the seat next to me on the plane and yet another display of a total lack of game [but she liked my shoes!!!]
• all the great laughs and funny moments and getting to be around people i love on my berfday

crazy view of LA as the plane came into land...awfully flat and a bunch of straight, parallel, perpendicular lines...

and the breaks just keep on coming

so it's pretty clear the blogging has fallen off lately. i still find myself thinking about things to write about...just never at a convenient time to write (read: as i drive to and from work). add in being busy at work, lazy at home, and the fact that i can watch Heroes online thru netflix and it's a recipe for not a lot of blogging. the music blog is in worse shape.

i guess the hope is that the continued thinking and pondering will catch up to me...and also that i'll get the necessary inspiration to write about some of the thoughts. the need to write on the music blog is beginning to gnaw at me but i should get some sleep for now...only because the netflix site is undergoing maintenance. anywho...goodnite.

in need of refining

my writing definitely needs work. i feel my last post is an example of a poor job of failing to express my thoughts in a clear manner. i think i shouldn't write with the tv on as much as i do as it simply distracts me and disrupts my train of thought. i should do a better job of remembering exactly what i want to write about on the occasions that i end up writing about thoughts i spent time at an earlier time.

anywho...that's about it for tonite. been working most of the day but made a nice dinner and got some pinkberry...sprinkling in some vegging out and olympics viewing to make the day bearable. another day of work tomorrow which isn't ideal...i'm already looking forward to next weekend and it's still this weekend. can't wait for the weekend after next, making the long-awaited return to the City after what will be 7 weeks of not venturing north (must be a record for the last year). looking forward to time with friends and some serious dancing. it's why i need to break out the old school moves and get my practice on. ha.

move your feet.

in my last entry i wrote about a lack of crushes. it was probably a misstatement for me to go that far...i'd say i am crushing on at least one gurl. in typical fashion i do nothing about it...she's my gym crush and to be honest approaching a gurl at the gym is awkward on its own and i'm totally not that guy who is at the gym to hit on the ladies. also, i don't see my gym crush too often...and finally i'm just me and my habit is to not do anything about a gurl i'm crushing on.

but i think in a way what i was expressing last time i wrote was more a lack of passion and excitement about things in life. not a general malaise but just a lack of specific things to get hyphy about, so to speak. yet since last writing i've come to realize that too is untrue.

i'm excited and passionate about many things in life, from some of the upcoming big events to just things i can do everyday. today, i took a "break" from my workout [after being on a elliptical machine next to the gym crush and of course doing nothing but wondering why i was really tired and felt kinda ill] and headed into the studio the gym has. it was empty and so i took the opportunity to attempt to relive some younger days and actually try out some of the dance moves learned back late in high school...also updating with the new moves. importantly, i wanted to see how good or bad my six-step is these days.

the first attempts were not impressive but i began to realize that i'm actually stronger than i've ever been at this point in my life [tho i don't know if i'm in the best overall shape of my life] and got the six-step flowing pretty well. i goofed around with some other stuff and just generally had a good time rocking out on my own with no music [it would have been on like donkey kong if i had some tunes]. i love to dance...i'm looking forward to doing some dancing again soon and i plan on working things out on my own when that studio is empty. i'll keep watching movies from the awesomely bad dance movie vault for inspiration.

**********

in other news, it's been a little over a year since i started work. i've learned a lot, including things i like and things i don't like. i've also learned that i have a lot to learn. but it's about figuring it out and just taking things away from your experiences and gaining what you can from them.

i've long felt a temporary sense to this job and this time in LA. i think it is what lead to the feeling of lacking earlier. as my friend pointed out, there's a need to get back to the City for the crushes to materialize...but really it's just what is necessary to find permanency and settling and truly embracing all the various aspects of life, be it dancing or working or just putting the various pieces of life together.

i feel much of my rambling, random as it may seem at times, is actually a coherent set of thoughts, emotions, concerns, and wonders. the coherence comes from the fact that my ramblings tend to go to the various aspect of life, i ramble about the many things that make up my goofy, foolish individuality.

anywho...i'm rambling and distracted by funny Olympic events. i leave with this...

Whitney Houston - I Wanna Dance With

that was a pretty redonkulous hiatus.

so, i clearly strayed far, far away from the goal of blogging daily for a month. i had a good run but totally lost it as of late...in part it came from being busy...but that is more of an excuse than an actual justification for the shortcomings on the writing front.

i think it really goes to just a lack of focus and a fractured train of thought of late. at times interesting topics flowed thru my mind but either i was not in a place where i could write or i simply just couldn't focus myself on the task. while not much is new, even on the intellectual or mental front, some milestones have occurred in recent weeks...including hitting the one year mark at work. my thoughts on that are a bit all over the place, much as i find my thoughts more generally lately.

in chatting with a friend today we cracked jokes ever so briefly about the ladies we will marry. at one point i noted how i really can't say i've met the woman i will marry. not that one can ever really make the claim in either direction, one never knows until it happens i guess. and i'm in no rush to get married. but the point beneath the joke, and one i pointed out, was that i am in a way lacking any crushes at this time in my life.

when i look back at the various stages of "Lou" i can deifnitely identify the major crushes of each stage or era...from elementary school to middle school and high school...on to college and then law school...even the "adult" world has had its crushes for me. yet now i find myself a bit restless without a crush. the funny part is i never pursued any crush seriously...nothing ever came of them. but they provided something to daydream about...

does growing up entail less daydreaming? i sure hope not. but i definitely do ponder how i and my close friends will change as adulthood takes hold. my thoughts tend to center on whether i will ever really grow up enough, as i tend to think of myself as an overgrown child...or at least a foolish individual of mental youth.

my friend said i need to get back to the City for the crushes to materialize...and i do find myself running on fumes at times. at the least i could use a vacation and a get away from the daily routines of life...and i'm sure it would provide an opportunity to fall in love with a gurl i know next to nothing about and will not pursue but just daydream about in my own time. i am reminded of part of one of the quotes on my brother's facebook profile about fallin in love:

Sometimes it was all but ephemeral, maybe only
an afternoon, but not less real for that.
They stay in my mind these beautiful people,
or anyway people beautiful to me, of which
there are so many. You, and you, and you,
whom I had the fortune to meet, or maybe
missed.

i think i have a penchant for such types of falling in love...completely unreal in a way...but just as exciting and fun and in its own way meaningful no less. the funny part about it is i don't really think i would know how to actually be serious about dating these days...the past year or so of exploring my individuality has been highly rewarding and eye-opening in many ways.

anywho...this was tonite's rambling of thoughts that pretty much came as i attempted to write, feeling a need to do so even if i didn't really start out with much in mind.

also...